The art of coming home to yourself, but what does it really mean?
> Being comfortable on your own
> Being aware of your vision, mission, and purpose in life
> Knowing and sticking to your principles and values
> Having a system that enhances your growth (mental, physical, and spiritual aspects)
> Confronting your past mistakes and evaluating them
Comfort on your own
A long-term co-dependency and attachment might trigger this idea of being comfortable on your own. Not only you are so used to having others to depend on, to work together with, but it truly does a thing to your brain.
When something disappears or is unable to proceed with the plan, how does that leave you? You might find it odd and always trying to find something to fill in that void. Whether you must adjust or find other things that would replace them. The choice is up to you. Practice self-love and show compassion towards ourselves. Coming home to yourself is about restoring your inner peace.
What is your personal legend?
There are tons of frameworks out there about finding yourself that you can try. The key is to keep asking questions and to be honest with yourself. This kind of vulnerability opens doors that lead you to where you are supposed to be. Your vision drives your mission, and both define your purpose in life.
“Your Personal Legend is what you have always wanted to accomplish. Everyone when they are young knows what their personal legend is, at that point in their lives everything is clear and everything is possible. They are not afraid to dream and to yearn for everything they would like to see happen to them in their lives.“– Paul Coelho, The Alchemist
Within the journey, you may meet others who know exactly what they want to do. But, you may also encounter those who don’t know what they’re doing, but they keep going… and that is totally okay. To realize one’s personal legend is one’s only real obligation. When you really want something all the universe conspires in helping you achieve it. Therefore, trust in the process. If you’re religious, thank the Lord.
Principles and values to keep close
Having values and guiding principles can be your sort of anchor towards how you may perceive life. It is your source of truth in dealing with worldly matters. What is right and wrong, what is good and bad, and what keeps you going.
Those are the set of moral values that help you behave and make a decision. It can be influenced by your childhood or the environment where you grew up. It is also important to note that your values and guiding principles may change as you experience things. Other people may have different or even contradicting values, but you do you. Coming home to yourself feels like belonging; it holds us and enables us to hold others.
Creating a holistic system for growth
What matters to you, what doesn’t? When you’ve identified your goals, principles, and values, you are one step away from becoming your potential self! Congratulations, you are not afraid to dream big, and truthfully, you are brave enough to be willing to make them a reality.
“A goal is a result you want to achieve; a system is a process that leads to those results.”– James Clear, Atomic Habits
As the saying goes, life isn’t about the destination, it’s about the journey. Goals are hyper-focused on the destination, while systems are embracing the journey. For example, if you’re struggling with your physical health, you would set a goal to become healthier and stronger. Once you accomplish that goal, the result you get is a healthy and strong body. Temporarily. Until you don’t work out anymore. That is to say, the result will reveal itself if we are able to work on the input, that is the effort we put out, or the system.
Goal: Finish your reading list // Read a lot
Intention: I want to grow by learning from others or from stories
System: Read a book every day for 30 minutes, in the morning or before bed
Reflecting and evaluating yourself
Keep in track of your feelings, experience, and thoughts. Only then, you can understand more about your growth. Let’s say you are one impatient woman. How do you really know that you’ve improved in that aspect?
By reflecting on your past self, seeing why it works or doesn’t work, you are able to connect with yourself. Confronting your behaviour or thoughts seem easier said than done, but it is a practice. Start with a monthly reflection. You can because you are used to doing them. The question is, when are you going to start?
You may have been contemplating whether or not you should do something. If you’re reading this, this is your sign to start coming home to yourself. Manifest and visualize that person who you want to become, and become.